Things that are Life Doesn't Go the Way You Planned It

Wednesday, August 12

From marathon training to infertility treatments. Life and training hasn't gone the way that I had intended it to go. For me, this picture says it all:

I don't know how many times I have thought back through our infertility journey that if we had gotten pregnant right off the bat we would have a 6 year old, and maybe other children too. That is always wishful thinking, and the thinking's of "what if." When ever I start thinking like that it always seems to put me in a bad mood. I mean you can't take those "what if's" now and put them into play in your life, so why dwell on them?!

I was on Facebook a few weeks ago and a friend posted this: "...all I have to say is life rarely goes as you want it to or as you plan it. Life throws some major curveballs when you don't expect it. All I can say is stick strong through it. Through all the tears and sorrow, stick strong. Whatever you're going through or whatever trial you face, you can always, ALWAYS get through it."

I loved it so much that I thought I needed to share what she says cause it's SO true! When has life ever gone the way you had intended it to go?! Um, for me, never. I have always had stuff come up that I wasn't expecting or had to do things that were out of my comfort zone. 

It was interesting to me that that same day I read that from my friend I saw a new blog post from Al Fox titled "I Don't Want to Be a Mom..." The title took me by surprise and I was intrigued by what she had to say. This is part of what Al said that really spoke true to me:

"There are those struggling with moving forward out of fear of their circumstances or pride in their own desires and vision of how they think their life should be. The Lord always provides and always blesses and it is always profoundly better than what we could have ever imagined for ourselves— greater than we even knew was available!"

I find it very ironic that when Chase and I attempt to go see a fertility specialist, or do any type of fertility treatments, we have financial issues that come up the week or two before our appointment (this has happened before and that's why I say it's ironic). In July our dog, Hurley, got bit by another dog costing us a few hundred dollars for him to get better. Then Chase and I had the day off  for a Utah Holiday, and my purse got stolen out of our car, which had about $600 cash alone in my purse (we use the Dave Ramsey envelope system). Which now will put a little bit of a strain on us, but won't throw us completely off course.

I was texting a friend and told her how I sometimes feel that Chase and I are being stopped at all costs to try and prevent us from starting a family. She said that Satan knows how powerful of parents we'll be, and that he will keep trying to stop us, but we need to keep moving forward as long as we feel that it's the right thing for us. So even though we had a few things come up that put up a road block, we should still press forward, because the Lord will always provide a way and will bless us, just like what Al said.

Once my friend reminded me of that one road block (Satan), I kept thinking of this quote that my 10th grade teacher had on the board before a hard test:

Life definitely hasn't gone as how Chase and I thought it would go. We don't have kids, we have 2 dogs. We don't get to go on vacations with our children, we go on vacation by ourselves. Instead of spending money on children, we spend it on ourselves. Some would say that's a blessing, I don't see it like that at all.

Looking back on the 6 years of trying to have kids, it's been a rough and a well learned road. I think things have gone how they were supposed to, though it definitely wasn't the way that we wanted them to originally go. You know what, I'm now okay with that. I'm finally to that point that if it's God's will for us to have kids then so be it. But it's taken me 6 long years for me to learn that, and there are definitely days that are hard, and some that are easy. 

So what did I get from all this and what you should get from it too? That it's okay for life to not go the way you planned it to go. Life changes, people change, the world changes and we grow. But as long as we press forward, stay strong and tough it out, the Lord will bless us way better than we ever imagined. I know that to be true!
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Twitter: @runwinfertility
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Facebook: Running with Infertility

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